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Lana feelsThe current mood of xengirl at www.imood.com

One word answers to the questions in my soul

I don't think, just write them down

All that matters in the end is what you ask

The answer is in the next question

I can't love you if I don't understand you

Can I understand you if I don't love you?

Can I understand you if I do?

Can I help it?

One-word answers but questions without end

Yes, I know I can't write poetry, and no, I don't care. I've been playing word games while waiting for Lila. I don't think she's coming back. I hope she's not in trouble. You know what provides interesting insight to the subconcious? Get a piece of paper, and write down words. Not phrases, not sentences, just words. Don't think about them, just write them. Double-space it on a page, then go back and read it. Then write them on another piece of paper, but put sentences or phrases or whatever comes to mind with them. It takes a while, but it's interesting. Okay, I was going to do a different entry for this, but then I realized none of you poor people out there would get to read the above unless you went back to my older entries and did so. And since that would crush you, I figured I'd just put it down here and ruin the "I'm a psycho" mood of it all. Deal with it. Okay, so what did happen today? I wandered. That's what I do on weekends, I wander. Actually, I didn't wake up until about noon, but I woke up to Danielle's new "Sounds of Sex" CD coming through the wall. A little scary first thing in the morning when you don't know what's going on. Then I hung out with Shaina, Danielle, Jason and Lila for a while in the common room, then me and Lila went to Subway and the City Market, went to the computer lab, got coffee, went back to the dorm, hung out, cleaned my room, did some homework, went to dinner, went to study assist. I've gained nicknames. Lila's decided I am The Elf. Joe's decided I'm Daria. I've decided grrrrr. That's all my news for today, but the most interesting part is yet to come. You know, nightime in the dorms? Always a fascinating experience... OOOOH! I remember what it was! I talked to Amy today! I was so happy! Happy happy happy happy happy! I haven't actually talked to her, as in, verbally, in SO long it's scary! And I miss her. So I'm happy! I let her talk to Lila, and she was good, for her. Let's put it this way; the most damaging question she asked was whether she had purple hair and one eye. And for Amsy, that's being good. And Lila says she likes her voice, which I suppose is a good thing. I'm so happy! I miss my bunny, and she's acting like herself again. We had a real conversation! Not about anything very important, but it was actually talking, which at about the middle of last year was kind of really difficult. Oh, I'm so happy! I sound like such a dork, I realize, but you have to remember that she's been my best friend for five years, and I haven't talked to her in a really long time. And damnit, I have a right to be happy whenever I want to! So there!

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