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11:15 p.m.

Lana feelsThe current mood of xengirl at www.imood.com

Ah, orgasms. I do so enjoy them. As do most people, I'm sure, but right now I am feeling entirely self-absorbed and I don't care about anybody else who likes them because right now, I do and that's all that I care about. Except perhaps for Adam, who also likes them. And of whom I am growing almost inordinately fond. Today, soon to be yesterday, was a very strange day indeed. Good, definitely good, but strange. It was raining in the morning, which meant that it was nice and cool and not-so-humid all day, but the sun had come out and was shining its watery rays by the time we were out of class. We (we in the context of summer school generally being Andrea, Kylie, Adam, and myself) spent the majority of the class period doing the girl-talk thing. Okay, so that was mostly Andrea, Kylie and me, while Adam sat with us and looked on in dismay. Discussing things like periods and boyfriends and orgasmming or not and faking it and eyebrows and all the other things that girls talk about. I've never actually been very good at it, since I'm always the baby, but I think I managed to sound like a fairly normal teenager throughout the entire thing. By the end of it Adam and the strange Canadian boy who sits behind Andrea were just looking at us like we were some sort of alien life form. It was fun. Not highly intellectual, but fun. You learn something new every day. So there was that. And then Mr. Kniss made us all go back to our regular seats and so we were lined up thusly;





Strange Canadian Boy (whose real name is Roland, pronounced "Rawlond" not "Rowland"), all in a neat little row by the windows. Kylie and Andrea went to sleep, SCB Roland went back to his book, and Adam and I went on talking, as we generally do, just about random things. And he did more singing, which always melts me because it's the one thing where he's not so damn cocky. His eyes get all melty and my insides go with them. Melt. Then class was over, and he did that thing where he puts his hand on that part of my back where it curves and pushes in an attempt to get me to go wherever it is he wants me to, and then slid it around and left it just resting on my hip. It made for an interesting journey down the packed and jostly stairs, but I wouldn't have moved away for all the space in the world. So we made our way out and to the corner where we part ways and he still hadn't moved away, and I started to say/point out that I was going the other way but he just shook his head and said I was going with him. So, I did, and we went up on the bridge so he could have a cigarette, but I really had to go potty so I told him he was coming to McDonalds with me and he did. We went in and he looked puzzled when I didn't get in line and asked me what I wanted here and I made a vague gesture towards the bathrooms and a small and generally unintelligable noise, and he said "Here, I'll hold your books." Did I mention how much I like this guy? He's perfect for me. He's Wiccan, he's bi, he's sorta goth, he's not always what he seems on the outside, he sings, and he's fluent in Lani. In that way that I speak that's half babble and half gesture and that takes most people a while to pick up. It's special that he can pick up on the subtle nuances of a gesture. And then offer to hold my books. So that was taken care of, and then it was time for him to start back. But he looked at his watch and said he'd probably be late anyway so he might as well be very late, and told me I was coming home with him. To which I responded with a nod and a series of gestures. And so I ended up at his house. Where we did not have sex, but we came pretty damn close. And then there were the orgasms. And now I have to go.

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