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6:16 p.m.

Lana feelsThe current mood of xengirl at www.imood.com

So yesterday I did something stupid. I took my ex to the rainbow-land street fair. Why I did this I can't really say, but I did. I saw the signs for Market Days, which is what they were calling it, when I took my sister shopping, and I wanted to go. So, I was talking to Bree, and I mentioned it to her, and somehow ended up saying that we should go together. Though I didn't exactly say what it was, just said it was a street fair kind of thing on North Halsted. I didn't know what to expect, but I was thinking maybe a bunch of sales and so on, interesting people, booths, fun. Well, all of those were true, but what I didn't realize is that the entire GBLT community was going to be there. Or that they were going to block off the entire rainbow lane. (which is yet another of my little euphemisms for the stretch of 6 or so blocks along N. Halsted avenue between Broadway and Belmont where there are rainbows on the streetlights and pride flags on all the stores and where the girls will be boys and the boys will be girls or at least everybody is checking out their own gender and where basically I belong) So we got a ride from Neil and Stina, who had to be down that way anyhow, and as we got out of the car her eyes bulged. So we went over to the check-in point, paid our $3, got our hands stamped and walked in. Within 5 minutes, I was thinking this was a really, really bad idea. She was walking really fast about a foot ahead of me, her eyes still all bugged out, shoulders all in that way that they get... When you've been as close to somebody as I was with her, you know when their mood changes. But as we walked up and down, looking at booths and so on, she relaxed a lot and started to smile and enjoy it. She kept giving me suspicious looks, like I had planned the whole thing just to ambush her, but she got used to it and I think she enjoyed it. In fact, I'm fairly sure she did. And the fair kicked major ass, but I'll write about that later. Anyhow, so we did the fair circuit for a while, then went up a few blocks to the Alley, didn't get anything, got some coffee at Dunkin Donuts, went to the Army Surplus store, went back to my house. She slept over, and we stayed up until 3 in the morning talking about random stuff, even us a little. Not a whole lot, but at least we've stopped dodging the subject and the air between us is clear. Evidently it's now okay for us to change in front of each other, which is a good sign in that it means she's cool with us just being friends with a history. And so all in all, it was a wonderful day.

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