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1:17 p.m.

Lana feelsThe current mood of xengirl at www.imood.com

I ate lunch with Mandy today. Mandy who is evidently done being mad at me and we're getting back to normal. A no-public-contact normal, but normal nonetheless. She started talking about electrons. How they find a specific orbit and they stay there and they don't waver no matter what, that any electron that does waver is lost and in big trouble. She said I don't have a category. I don't fit in anywhere. I asked for examples. She said something completely incomprehensible about my sexual orientation and how it affects the types of people that I like. Dark hair and light eyes is what actually affects who I like, at least physically speaking, and other than that I just go for the interesting ones. I didn't contradict her, though, because I wanted to know where she was going with this. She seemed pretty serious about it, like there was really something she was trying to tell me. So I asked for another example. She said, intelligence. People are supposed to be either smart or dumb, be it book smart or common sense smart. If you're book smart, you're supposed to get straight A's and be a "geek," and I don't get straight A's but I do tend towards intelligence. Avoiding categories. I think she wanted to say something about the type of people I make friends with but she didn't quite get around to it. I make friends with anyone who crosses my path and interests me. Evidently, by growing fond of people based on their individual character instead of some pre-determined set of characteristics, I'm avoiding categorization. I think that bothers Mandy, because she doesn't like things that refuse to stay in their boxes. Boxes keep her world stable and by not fitting into one, by changing my characteristics with my mood, I think I disrupt her. I think it's good for her. Perhaps I shall try to be even more mercurial than ever.

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